I am
fun, flirty, vivacious, outspoken, politically incorrect, and slightly kinky.
comfortable in my own skin.
not a size two, or do I want to be!
going to wear footie pajamas and eat cookies in bed.
an intelligent and witty conversationalist. (I refuse to dummy down for anyone.)

not looking for a man to support me or be a father to my children. (I have that covered, thank you.)
a huge Bears fan.
not looking to get married.

never going to put out on a first date.
going to wear granny panties to ensure that I won put out on a first date.
very likely to put out on a second date. (I skip the panties altogether.)
able to say "no" and scream "yes".
not into anything sexual that involves blood or leaves marks. (spanking and hair pulling are perfectly acceptable)

You are
funny.
willing to try new things.
tall.
D/D free.
sarcastic.
well-mannered, for appearances.
able to leave work at work. (this implies employment)
into PDA
not a fitness freak. (If you have six-pack abs you spend too much time at the gym and looking in the mirror to have any time left for me.)
not going to give me a hard time for being a Bears fan.